The NRHEG High School clay target team is back in action and looking to repeat its conference title from last year.

This season the team is located in Conference 4, Class 4A. Unlike most other sports, clay target teams are slated in classes and conferences based on team size. Therefore, it is very common for teams to find themselves facing different teams in different conferences or classes each year. Last year, the NRHEG team won Conference 1 of Class 3A and eventually qualified for the first ever MSHSL State Clay Target Tournament.

The NRHEG girls’ track and field team had one of its strongest showings of the season, finishing second out of eight schools in the Blooming Prairie True Team meet Tuesday, April 28.

WEM was first with 816 points. The Panthers totaled 647.5, with Maple River third at 636.5.

“It was a very nice meet for our girls pulling off a second place,” said Panthers coach Duey Ferber.

Sophomore Maddie Wagner pulled off a first place in the high jump, clearing a personal-best 5 feet, 3 inches.

“It was a great jump,” said Ferber.

Also finishing first was the Panthers’ 4x200-meter relay team of Hailey Schuller, Gretchen Ramaker, Maddie Wagner and Marnie Wagner, who won in 1:54.2.

In many ways, school buildings should be miniature versions of the communities which create them.

For one thing, the children we send to them each day represent our own society, mirroring its priorities, its interests, and our hopes for its future. School buildings are often also the face of our communities, since local residents and visitors alike come for tournaments, milestone ceremonies, sporting events, and performances.

There has been much community interest, recently, in assuring that our school buildings truly do reflect the needs and interests of district students and residents. A few months ago, the school board responded by looking into an appropriate plan for expansion, renovation, and improvement. This plan was to have two priorities: meeting the needs of those who use our buildings, and being fiscally responsible.

I hope you have had the opportunity to attend at least one of the public meetings which have already been held. More information will be available soon in the form of published materials; you can also read more on the school web site: nrheg.k12.mn.us. Naturally, Board Members, myself, and other members of the school staff would also be happy to answer any questions.

I also hope you plan to vote on June 9. I believe you will see that renovations currently being considered will satisfy many needs, beginning with improved student safety and proceeding to greater educational efficiency and an improved experience for public events and performances.

Recent renovations to district buildings have brought important improvements. The new lower commons and updated kitchen facilities at the New Richland site have fostered more of a sense of community within the building, giving students an inviting place where they can gather for anything from casual conversation to guided study time. The secure entryway offers much stricter control over who is entering or leaving the building during the school day.

It is important to have that same sense of control in our elementary building in Ellendale. Preliminary plans have a number of safety upgrades for our youngest students. These include extending the property so that bus loading and unloading can occur away from the street, and installing a secure entry which connects directly to the school office, rather than allowing visitors direct access to school hallways.

To solve the pleasant “problem” of expanding academic programs, we are also looking at expanding the number of classrooms in the Ellendale building. Plans call for renovating selected spaces within the current structure to create six additional rooms, some of which would be used to help diversify and expand the ways our youngest students are taught. Learners could be grouped for targeted instruction, with lessons delivered at their specific levels.

Another way we hope to make the learning environment more pleasant is by controlling the humidity in all district classrooms, both in Ellendale and New Richland. 

Since the main gym in Ellendale is also where concerts and performances take place, upgrades to sound system and improved sound dampening will provide a more enjoyable experience for our elementary programs and concerts.

Similar and even more comprehensive changes are in the works for the northeast gym at the New Richland site. This space would still be suitable for practices and gym classes, but would no longer be the location of indoor sporting competitions like volleyball and basketball games. Instead, its usefulness for performances, concerts, gatherings, and ceremonies would be improved. The wooden bleachers would be replaced by more comfortable, retractable tiered seating for about 600 people. Acoustic features would be installed to improve sound quality, making it easier to appreciate performances, speeches, and music. For the sake of improved learning and practices, the band and choir rooms would also receive some acoustic upgrades.

At the southeast corner of the building, in the direction of the outdoor sports facilities is planned. This area would not only be large enough for the types of games already being held at our school, it would meet state high school league standards to hold tournaments and larger-scale events. The upgraded sports facility will not only be more comfortable and attractive, it will allow more competitions and events to be scheduled locally, probably increasing the number of people who come to our communities.

Also providing additional gym space which is always a premium, lessening the early/late practice time students must spend in support of their specific sporting team.  As a bonus, its location places it only a short walk down the hallway from the commons area, where concessions could be sold and served.

Along with the new gym would be new locker rooms and an improved weight room.  From my perspective, the new weight room is an absolute necessity: Right now fitness equipment used by students is housed in a crowded room with less-than-adequate ventilation. Sometimes so many students are trying to use the facility that many must perform their exercises in the adjoining hallway, which is neither private nor safe. Imagine trying to lift weights or do push-ups while others must walk past or around you to get where they are going.

The final set of renovations in the New Richland building would be in one of our science classrooms. Here, a space which was once an elementary classroom would be upgraded with sinks and work stations which would permit more practical teaching and learning. At the same time, a hallway would be added nearby to create an exit from that part of the building to the outdoors. This would allow access to an area where a future greenhouse is planned.

In both of our facilities audiences will greatly appreciate the upgraded facilities for performances and concerts, since seating and sound quality will be vastly improved. Learners will have expanded opportunities and a more comfortable environment, since they will have dehumidified and cooler classrooms, and space to diversify. 

I hope you can see the many ways these planned improvements will make our buildings safer, more educationally productive, and more useful to our community residents.

Not long ago in class, a student mentioned that she was halfway there on an assignment. My immediate response, being the child of the ‘80s that I am, was, “Are you livin’ on a prayer?” in reference to the 1986 Bon Jovi smash hit song.

Another student jumped in and said, “My mom ALWAYS plays that song! She’s seen Bon Jovi in concert like 42 times!” (Upon further investigation, I’ve learned the number is closer to 27.)

This child has been exposed to Bon Jovi and other excellent rock music from that time period, thanks to her mom. She even grudgingly admitted that it’s pretty good music. (And yes, many of us joined in an a cappella rendition of the chorus to the song!)

Last week I wrote about the influence we sometimes have on our children, without even thinking about it. After the comment by that student with the music, I was inspired to expand on that very subject: ways we corrupt our children!

We have so much influence on our children that sometimes we must think about the power we wield. Do our children always like the music we play, just because they’re exposed to it? Certainly not, but some of that can creep in. Hey, you listen to enough polka music, as I did growing up in New Ulm, and you might develop an appreciation, if not love, for that style of music.

Anton will often choose the same country station Michelle listens to, though Jayna would rather tune in to the hip-hoppity, jip-joppity schlock that passes for pop music these days. Still, she can be caught singing some of those country songs and maybe even if I’m tuned in to Power 96 and listening to classic rock.

Being the huge Star Wars fan I am, I sat my kids down even before they entered kindergarten and had them watch all six movies. (Side note for those who care: when doing this, always show the original trilogy first. It makes the scene where Darth Vader revels that he’s a dad that much more dramatic!) Both kids can recite lines from the movies and are certainly looking forward to the new movie debuting in December. Would that have happened without my influence? Possibly, but I’m always amazed at how few 7th graders have ever seen even one of those movies before I show one in class for a writing assignment.

I’ve worked the angle with another of my great loves, comic books. I read them to the kids when they were young and bought some for them. Jayna has never really expanded on that, though she has enjoyed some of the Marvel movies. Anton, however, has jumped into this hobby with me full bore. We still read some comics together every month and talk about what is coming up in the future. This past week, we attended Free Comic Book Day and saw the new Avengers movie together. Will he always love comics? I hope so!

Many of you probably have similar experiences. You share a hobby and are excited when your child loves it like you do. Whether it’s a sport, hunting, knitting, cooking, or something else, parents swell with pride when they create a parent-child bond through a shared interest. Again, I ask: would the child find that enjoyment without our guidance?

We do have to be careful. Kids are very impressionable, and sometimes we have bad habits that we shouldn’t pass on to them. A University of Washington study showed that children of smokers are twice as likely to start smoking between the ages of 13 and 21. That’s probably not the type of influence we want to exert on the kids.

How about careers? There doesn’t seem to be a lot of reliable information out there on statistics of that, partially because kids often follow a career that wasn’t even a job when their parents were young! One study in England showed only 7% of kids choosing the same career as a parent. Do you want your child to follow your path? I suppose that depends. Do you enjoy your job or not? Is the outlook bright for job creation in that area in the years to come?

We all want our kids to grow up happy in their job and interests. We really do influence them in so much of that. At the end of the day, if the kids are happy when they find that job and strike out on their own, that’s what really counts, no matter how much we tried to corrupt them.

Word of the Week: This week’s word is tonsure, which means to shave the head, as in, “The barber wasn’t sure he wanted his son to learn to tonsure others as a permanent job.” Impress your friends and confuse your enemies!

The scurs set the Weather Eye on “plant” mode and plant farmers did, followed by some fast moving precip. Will there be more of that in our future or will we dry out? Starting Wednesday, mostly cloudy with a good chance of showers and thunderstorms. Highs in the upper 70’s and lows in the low 60’s. Mostly cloudy Thursday with a continued good chance of showers and thunderstorms. Highs in the mid-70’s with lows in the upper 50’s. Partly sunny for Friday with a modest chance of a shower or thunderstorm, Highs in the low 70’s with lows in the upper 40’w. Saturday, mostly cloudy with an increasing chance of a shower or thunderstorm. Highs near 70 with lows in the low 50’s. Mostly cloudy on Sunday with a good chance for showers or thunderstorms. Highs in the upper 60’s with lows near 50. Monday, mostly cloudy and cooler with continued decent chances for rain. Highs near 65 with lows in the mid-60’s. Mostly cloudy on Tuesday with a good chance of showers and thunderstorms. Highs near 65 and lows in the upper 40’s. On May 9th we will see 14 hours and 30 minutes of daylight for the first time since last August 3rd. Mother’s Day is the 10th and the normal high for May 10th is 68 and the normal low is 46. After stocking it with walleyes, the scurs will be napping by the ceement pond with lines tied to their toes.

What a watershed week for field progress! Most of the corn was finished up with a huge dent made in soybean planting. After some tacky soil conditions from rain that fell on April 24th, soil conditions were about as good as it gets. The soil temperatures started out cool in the mornings but by afternoon were well into the 60’s and 70’s at the 2” depth at the SROC in Waseca. Very little rain fell across the area making it a delight to venture forth without worrying about getting stuck. Corn planted on April 14th began to emerge on May 1st and by this past Monday, it could be rowed in areas. Soybeans planted April 17th were just cracking the soil surface Monday afternoon, showing no signs of problems with some of the cool weather experienced since they’ve been in the ground. We are off to a great start, a far cry from what the past two spring planting seasons have treated us to.

Around the countryside and at the ranch as well, flowering plants have burst into bloom. The wild plum thickets have been heavenly to smell and they almost look like snow against the greening backdrop sometimes. About the time they’ve run their course, the flowering crabs kick in with their pinks and reds. The apple trees at the ranch have been in bloom as well, adding their very delicate fragrance to a warm afternoon. As our trees are not as loaded with blooms as last year, we probably won’t see an apple crop like that one this time. Oak trees flowered  and while their flowers aren’t anything to look at, the squirrels might take issue with that observation. At least the leaves were as big as a squirrel’s ear. 

More white-throated sparrows keep showing up, although we’ve seen no white-crowned or Harris’s sparrows yet. We have had a rose-breasted grosbeak though that showed up on May 2nd. There is still an occasional junco, but they seem to have departed, likely for points north. Robin nests keep appearing in strange places, the most recent one being on top of a couple grease guns hanging in the barn. Fortunately I have one in the garage where they can’t get at it. Goldfinch numbers have suddenly increased with the amount of foliar cover on the rise. They’ve become comfortable with the new roller feeder and seem to be telling their friends. That’s OK because this was a relatively cheap winter to feed the birds. Forty lbs. of sunflower and safflower carried us through most of it. Last but not least, an oriole was spotted at the ranch attempting to get at the hummingbird feeder. He did make his way over to the jelly feeder so spring has officially sprung at the ranch. 

This week has really brought out the red admiral butterflies. These smaller reddish-orange, white and brown beauties make me happy when they make their bouncy flight around the yard. Their larvae make me even happier when they feed on their favorite food, stinging nettles. The American toads have taken center stage in the wetland here at the ranch as well as across the area. Their high pitched trilling fills the still night air and overpowers the sound of the remaining chorus frogs.

In the barnyard, the sounds haven’t been nearly as pleasant. We decided Sunday morning it was time to wean the ewes and lambs. They of course are never willing participants in this event and we have the bumps and bruises to prove it. However, they’re not the ones paying the feed bill. Some of them are absolutely heartbroken to be separated, but then some of the lambs are big enough so they almost lift the ewe off the ground when they go to nurse. It’s time when that happens. There is plenty of grass now and the one group of 10 ewes was fortunate enough to get a short trailer ride to the kindly neighbors’, a little piece of sheep heaven on earth. Luckily after a couple days the noise abates and life goes on. In the meantime as we heal up from our aches and pains, chores have been sped up immensely and that makes everyone happy.

Sunday was also a day to mow the windbreak and after that, spend time getting the vine crops seeded. My little fat greenhouse buddy had everything ready so it was a piece of cake. That and I got to visit with several old friends who wondered what the heck I was up to at Souba’s greenhouse. Gotta keep ‘em guessing and seeding 108 hills of vine crops will do that. It’s easy to get ahead of yourself with gardening so I like to take it slow and not make any more work out of it than necessary. Observing things first like soil temps, rainfall, weed control, soil fertility, and insects are all part of the equation. The plants we brought back from my mom’s place have preoccupied my garden gawking time at the ranch at this point. The lilies of the valley wasted no time unfurling and they are loaded with flower buds. They give all the appearances that they will quickly cover the area on the northwest side of the house. All the peonies we dug are alive and coming now although they vary in size. The Jack in the pulpit apparently likes its new home, shooting up not one but two shoots. And the Solomon’s Seal berries planted a couple autumns back suddenly sprang to life with numerous small plants scattered in the shade bed. While Mom is no longer with us, seeing these plants she loved will make it feel a little more like Mother’s Day.

See you next week…real good then.  

Of all the angels high above there is one above the rest. Of course this angel’s name is love.

Soon it will be Mothers Day, but then, isn't every day Mothers' Day?

The child a mother carried next to her heart for nine months shares a closeness that can never be equaled except by a mother who has been chosen to raise a child she was unable to give birth to.

Once a person becomes a mother, life takes on many characteristics, including joys, problems, rewards and sacrifices to name a few. I could go on and on but nothing matches the miracle of birth and the new life that has begun. Consider if you will how each person will "mother" their child or children that have become a part of their life. What could be closer than a mother and her child? The way they treat their relationship will eventually affect every relationship in the family.

The need to belong is basic in every person. That is why families are so important. That sense of belonging is important to everyone. What we learn from our mothers, as well as being a part of a family, are the most unforgettable lessons that our lives will ever teach us.

The things that a mother will teach her children and the stories she may have from those experiences may be full of mementoes that say, "I Love You." Loving a child doesn't mean giving in to all their whims. To love them is to bring out the best in them, and to teach them to love what is difficult.

Schools will teach children how to read, but the environment of the home must teach them what to read. School can also teach them to think, but the home must teach them what to believe. It is desirable that children be kind, appreciative and pleasant. Those qualities should be taught and not hoped for.  Children learn more about their faith during the bad times than they do during the good times.

It is nice to be remembered, but nothing will ever match the times be spent together - just mother and child. It is important to remember that too much love never spoils children. Never fear spoiling children by making them happy. Children become spoiled when we overindulge and substitute presents for presence. Burned out kids are usually the result of burned out parents.

Happiness is the atmosphere in which all good affections grow.  Tomorrows depend on the way we plant the seeds of today. Those times later show in how the children grow and how that affects others.

Erma Bombeck has told us that "Motherhood is the second oldest profession." Thus it would seem that the mothers' how-to-manual would be complete by now, but mothers are not all the same. We know that. Mothers are different and require different solutions of caring for their families. Some mothers are so full of love and understanding it spirals out in every direction, while some are hard to understand as they withhold the love that is buried deep inside.

Despite their difference, mothers everywhere share a common bond as they have worked hand-in-hand with God to create new life in our world.

Being a mother is a God given profession. It is hard work. It is interesting, challenging and honorable. It is a constant, evolving process of adapting to the needs of their children. Mothers need to be patient with their children in the same way that God is patient with us.

That old saying about moving mountains and kids reminds us that, "People who want to move mountains must start by carrying away small stones." For many mothers, it may seem easier to move mountains than to move those sleepy kids out of their beds each morning. Such are the challenges of motherhood. A mother’s arms are made of patience and there isn't anything sweeter than the children you hold in them. 

Whether mothers are moving mountains, kids, or both, it is important for them to remember that it takes patience and a steady hand. They can't give up. They need to do their best and keep carrying away those small stones - one stone at a time - and then leave the rest up to God.

Being a mother is a constant, evolving process of adapting to the needs of their children. I can think of many ways mothers teach and make us grow. Remember, children need love, especially when they don't deserve it. The tone of one’s voice and the expression of attitude speaks more than words.

Motherhood is the toughest job you will ever love. Being a mother is both rewarding and frustrating, and not to be taken lightly.  Children grow up quickly. There is so much to teach them and do and time flies by so quickly. If one doesn't teach their children, society will. Enjoy their company and love them. A mother’s first duty of love is to listen. Motherhood brings us joy, but it also brings exhaustion as they help children develop his or her individuality. Growing up, knowing you are accepted and loved can make an incredible difference.

There is no friendship, no love, like that of the mother for her child. I like the fact that motherhood also helped me become more than I might have been. Without my children, would I have been able to live up to my full potential?

Moms are usually the ones who give the hugs, hugs of encouragement, hugs of acceptance, hugs of forgiveness, and hugs of shared joy.

On Mother's Day, thank your mother for the greatest gift they could give. Thank your mother for the time they took, the love they gave, and for making your life the very best they could.

Birthdays and anniversaries:

• Thursday, May 7th: Brody Hanson, Brian Jensen, John Snyder, Nancy Swearingen Grant, Brian Johnson, Heidi & Jason Owen, their 10th, Bryan & Diane Brighton, Heidi (Crabtree) & Jason Owen, their 10th

• Friday, May 8th: Grace Carol Jean Riskedahl, her 3rd; Olivia Kay Smith, her 9th; Kristina Follien, Marguerite Christensen Nelson, Ronald Wangsness, Elizabeth Bremer, Sandy Neubauer

• Saturday, May 9th: Elli Pearl Baker, Aidan Jeffrey Schlaak, his 10th; John Jensen, Sue Pence, Jake Simmons, Julie Haroldson, Sue Hohansee, Audrey Horan, Karol Carroll, Nijole Aaseth, Rachelle Doran, Carolyn Greer, Karla Kelly, Jerry Westrum, Jill (Ottesen) & Cam Kehne

• Sunday, May 10th: Tari (Walterman) Erickson, Ryan Callahan, Tina Nelson, Steve Nielsen, Christine Ingvaldson, Dave Oeljenbrun, Mary Wilker, Brody Johnson, Mark & Sara Misgen, Rande & Jamie Nelson

• Monday, May 11th: Michaela Ann Hanielton, Jaxon Edward Beavens and Parker Reese Beavens, their 9th; Carol Cromwell Cox, Ed Haberman, Krista Hanson, Troy Janka, Daniel Robertson, Robert Vaith, Loretta Schewe, Scott & Shannon Pacholl

• Tuesday, May 12th: Richie Robinson, Dorothy Jensen, Larry & Jean Klocek

• Wednesday, May 13th: Brooklyn Christine DuBois, her 12th; David Richards, Rose Glienke, Troy Donahue, Curt Esplan, John Nechanicky, Holly Pence, Tracy Swearingen, Larry Schmidt, Reed Thostenson, Rose Glienke, Alan & Kathy Knudson, John & Barbara

• Thursday, May 14th: Clair Dahl, Linda Olson, Anna Mae Peterson, her 10th; Katie Peterson, Ginger Thompson, Bruce Waage, Brad Wayne, Judy VerHey, Mark VerHey, Jeff Christensen, Shannon Krikava

• Friday, May 15th: Carter Hagen, Evan Dobberstein, Megan Grubish, Alex Wayne, Mark Flesche, Dan Hagen, Don Hagen, Nicole Strand Harris, Stephanie Krueger, Neil Berg, Sandy Jensen, Marsha Neitzell, Tammy Thompson, Brett & Jessica Richards, Ralph & Irene Krueger, Jon & Nicole Farr

• Saturday, May 16th: Ron Kubicek, Mark Reistad, Mark Skroch, Vernie Stieglbauer, Kim Lageson, Doug Lembke, Judy Karsjens, Anne Larson, Allycia Zinke, Becky Phagan, Bev White, Annie Larson, Christine & Brian Carlson

  Here's hoping that your special day brings you laughter, a light heart and much love.

As the weather becomes more spring/summer-like, my thoughts have turned to reminiscing about all the years our family spent camping. I can look back on those times and say yes, there were some trying times, but they were all good.

Before my wife and I welcomed our firstborn we would camp with a group of long-time friends and we always managed to have fun. Most of the time our outdoors activities consisted of Frisbee, whiffle ball or badminton, which was my personal favorite. This was just a lot of harmless fun that would give us a little exercise and a chance to compete without getting too serious.

On one of our first camping excursions we were with two other couples and Kenny Bauman, one of our group, had a tent that was built onto a trailer and when folded out made a nice-three room tent with a floor and a porch. It was decided that because there was room for all of us we could just use Kenny and his wife Georgette’s rig. We had decided to go to a campground in this farmer’s field on Lake Elysian. We were told the camp spots were on a first-come, first-serve basis and you paid on the honor system by depositing the money in the slot on the end of a pipe by the gate. I can’t remember for sure but I believe that it was $2 a night.

Once we were there we paid the money and picked a spot to set up camp. Setting up Kenny’s rig was not all that easy because it involved leveling the trailer and way too many tent poles and stakes for my liking. After we had finally accomplished that mission we decided it was time to gather some firewood. Besides my wife Jean and me the other adventurous campers were our friends Russ and Sue Laite. The girls decided that because men were gatherers, they would stay back and plan supper, but before that plan was put into action another camper approached us with some news we really didn’t want to hear. He informed us we were in another person’s spot and that we would have to move. We explained to him that it wasn’t just a matter of dragging a tent to another spot, but he was insistent so we began the taking it down. Eventually we had it moved, but we had to finish it in the dark.

After muttering more than a few expletives we finished the task and once again the gatherers were out pursuing firewood while the girls waited patiently for our return. We had to climb a barbed wire fence that surrounded the cow pasture and after stumbling around in the dark and finding numerous cockleburs and thistles while ripping our shirts and jeans on the aforementioned barbed wire, we were greeted by the bellering of the farmer’s bull. We hastily exited the pasture with only some scraggly branches and twigs to show for our effort. As we neared our latest campsite we were greeted by the three girls sitting around a roaring campfire. We asked them how? They said that the guy that asked us to move felt bad and offered to let them use his firewood. First more expletives but then an appreciation for the gesture he had made in an effort to atone for all of our work.

Whenever I camped I had one thing I always needed to have happen no matter what, and that was to be able to do a little fishing. It didn’t really matter what I was catching as long as I could fish. However, on this particular occasion I had visions of catching walleye off shore from the point on which we were camped. We had bought some minnows the evening before so we were up early and fishing at the crack of dawn, maybe not the crack but fairly early. It wasn’t long before we were getting bites and losing minnows with nothing to show for it. I finally had one on and as I reeled it in I knew without looking that it was a bullhead. This wasn’t just any bullhead, but one that went just a little larger than my minnow. All we caught on this trip were those little bullheads, and I have to admit this was one of the rare occasions that just catching any fish didn’t do it for me.

On another occasion we were camping with the same friends at a KOA near Owatonna and I had brought my trusty ultra-light with, just in case. There was a stream running through the campground so I just had to see if there were any fish in it and after a few casts I caught a sucker which was about 6 inches long. I went on to catch more of those fish and to say I was disappointed would be wrong. I hadn’t expected to catch anything and the kid in me was catching fish so this time it really didn’t matter to me what kind.

One 4th of July weekend our same group camped at a campground on Jefferson Lake. This time I had brought my boat along so we were able to fish both German and Jefferson but had very little success. It was a very hot weekend and the mosquitoes were biting a lot better than the fish. When we went to bed in our pickup camper you could hear those pesky little bloodsuckers buzzing at all the windows. Sometime during the night someone kicked the screen out of one of the windows and in the morning the inside of the camper looked like a blood bath had taken place. It’s like all of the mosquitoes were trapped in our camper and were taking it out on us because they couldn’t find their way out. I am starting to scratch myself just thinking about that time.

Until next time, the weather is getting nice and the fish should be biting so take some time to get out and enjoy the great Minnesota outdoors.

Please remember to keep our troops in your thoughts and prayers because they are the reason we are able to enjoy all the freedoms that we have today.

Echoes from the Loafers’ Club Meeting

My uncle Alfred plays football.

At his age?

The whole family can't wait for him to kick off.

Driving by the Bruces

I have two wonderful neighbors — both named Bruce — who live across the road from each other. Whenever I pass their driveways, thoughts occur to me, such as: Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is because I’m an idiot.

BYOTP

The kind lady told me that she regularly visited her aunt Cora at a nursing home. At the end of each visit, Cora asked her guest to bring her some toilet paper because she detested the toilet paper that was provided for her. My mother had been in the same facility, but had never once commented on the quality of its toilet paper. Perhaps being a person who once recycled catalogs as toilet paper, she hadn’t noticed. Visitors brought Cora toilet paper frequently. When Cora died, her closet was found to be stuffed with gifted toilet paper. She was perfectly happy using the toilet paper of the nursing home. What Cora was doing was encouraging visits. She didn't want better toilet paper, she wanted more company.

Funeral potatoes

I attended three wakes in one day. There was one at a church before the funeral and another at each of two funeral homes. I was glad that I’d known the deceased individuals and that neither funeral home offered trinkets reading, "Come again" as lagniappes.

A fellow mourner and I talked as we waited in line to pay our respects. He told me that he went to wakes regularly, but never attended funerals. I asked why.

"When I used to go to funerals," he said, "I’d eat a meal. I particularly enjoy funeral potatoes. I don't like getting a meal from someone without being able to buy them lunch in return."

My Grandma Cook had died. The funeral had passed. Relatives had gone home. My mother and her sister Helen were cleaning Grandma’s house. Books abounded, but each found a new home. Mom and aunt Helen were carrying the last few books out the door when books were dropped. Money fell from them. Were the bills used as bookmarks? That’s doubtful. I suspect Grandma found the books a place to hide mad money or to set aside a little moola for emergencies. Nobody else reported finding money in Grandma’s books. Maybe there had been no more. Mom and Helen fretted not. They’d gotten by without the money yesterday and they'd be all right without it tomorrow.

Hokey Pokey

This past winter, a first-time visitor to Minnesota asked me, "Is the weather always like this here?"

I replied, "Only when it’s cold, windy and snowing."

Eileen Harguth of Waseca told me that her grandson, Drew, told her that he was addicted to the Hokey Pokey until he turned himself around.

The weather has turned itself around. Spring has sprung. Maybe it was the Hokey Pokey that did it?

I was in a public library, trying to catch up on writing assignments. My wife loves to knit. She was knitting away furiously, trying to get a project finished before she ran out of yarn when I noticed that the substantial magazine rack wasn’t displaying three magazines because they were frequently stolen. The three periodicals rapidly rustled were Vanity Fair, GQ and Mental Floss.

My sister Georgianna attended a number of schools. My parents moved around early in their marriage, searching for the right place to call home. Georgianna made sure that her four children went to only one school and that they didn't steal magazines from libraries.

Let’s hope the thieves do the Hokey Pokey.

Thank you for thanking me

"Thank you," she said as I left the business.

"Thank you," I replied. I’d thanked her for thanking me.

While in the UK, I found myself saying "sorry" in reply to others saying "sorry" and they say "sorry" a lot there.

As I left the store where I’d thanked someone for thanking me, I realized I was OK with that.

Nature notes

Robert Frost wrote, "I have wished a bird would fly away, and not sing by my house all day; have clapped my hands at him from the door when it seemed as if I could bear no more. The fault must partly have been in me. The bird was not to blame for his key. And of course there must be something wrong in wanting to silence any song."

Meeting adjourned

If you can’t be kind, be kinder.

The following was told to me by a very unreliable turkey hunter named Bob Goetz from Austin, MN.

“If a turkey looks up to gobble when it’s raining, it can drown. That is why turkeys don’t gobble when it’s raining.”

He further stated, “If you see a turkey gobbling just as a heavy rain starts, give the turkey CPR if it keels over (pheasants, ducks, grouse, quail or partridge don’t have the above problem).

As an older walleye fisherman or fisherlady, I’m sure you can remember when the walleye limit was six daily in Minnesota. Like everything else changing, the limit has changed (to as few as just one on some lakes).

Three older, very cagy, and very good walleye fishermen have decided to go back to the Good Old Days of six being the limit per person in Minnesota. The following is what they plan on doing Opening Day, Saturday, May 9 in Minnesota:

They will start fishing early A.M. on Mille Lacs Lake and each catch the limit of one walleye. On to Leech Lake and each catch the limit of four walleyes. On to Red Lake and each catch the limit of two walleyes. With their limit of six walleyes as they leave Red lake that same day, they will reminisce the previous annual 39 years of being part of the AAL Fishing Team.

Who are these expert, non-mathematical fishermen? Bob Goetz of Austin, Bob Hanson of Albert Lea, and Paul Proft of Owatonna will proudly claim their ability to think outside the box.

Farmers State Bank is sponsoring a fishing contest from April 1 to November 30. The big prizes will be awarded only to Farmers State Bank customers. You must email a photo of your lunker along with a length and where caught. The three older, very cagy, and very good walleye fishermen (Bob, Bob and Paul) will become Farmers State Bank customers after their Big Lunkers are caught (once again thinking outside the box).

Would you like to meet at least one of the three outside-the-box thinkers? This is your chance. The CEO of Bob Hanson and her VIP lady friends of Central Freeborn Lutheran Church have scheduled a coach bus leaving from behind Slumberland in Albert Lea at 11 a.m. Sunday, June 28 to the performance by the Church Basement Ladies at the Plymouth Playhouse Theater. Prior to napping on the bus between Owatonna and Albert Lea, the bus will stop at KFC Buffet Supper in Owatonna.

The bus, the performance and KFC Buffet are all included in the prices of$53.0 per person paid in advance. Call Genie at 3507-788-0004 or Bob at 507-3737-8655 for reservations.

Reader, the Bus Trip is fact, the rest is fiction!

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Bob is a retired AAL (Aid Association for Lutherans) agent, currently working on his master’s degree in Volunteering. His wife, Genie, is a retired RN, currently working on her doctor’s degree in Volunteering. They have two children, Deb in North Carolina, and Dan in Vermont. Bob says if you enjoy his column, let him know. If you don’t enjoy it, keep on reading, it can get worse. Words of wisdom: There is always room for God.

George Henry Wangsness, Jr., age 66, of Wells, MN, died Sunday, May 3, 2015, at St Mary’s Hospital in Rochester, MN following a courageous battle with lung disease. A memorial service will be held Thursday, May 7, 2015, at 11 a.m. at Community Lutheran Church in Geneva, MN. Visitation will be Wednesday from 4-7 p.m. at Bruss-Heitner Funeral Home in Wells, MN, and continue one hour prior to services at the church on Thursday. Interment will be at Hillcrest Cemetery in Albert Lea, MN, and Pr. Kristen Venne will officiate. Bruss-Heitner Funeral Home of Wells is in charge of arrangements. Please see www.brussheitner.com to leave online condolences.