O.K., I admit it. I'm a pure failure at this "scaling back" idea.

Since announcing my intensions publicly in the Star Eagle a few weeks ago, many things have changed. That's not including some comments made in last week's Star Gazing, as have been mentioned around the office, but hopefully we'll clarify a few of those as this column progresses.

First, though, the first issue. I am not very successful at scaling back my working hours by shaving 20 hours per week off my previous schedule, as hoped and planned for. I get a D, if that - or, if Mr. D was feeling generous - maybe even a D+. But he's an English teacher. What good would that do? Let's just say that I'm a complete and utter failure at this scaling back stuff and leave it at that. But it does not mean I don't hold hope for improvement.

If anything, I have taken on even more since returning to the Star Eagle full time a couple weeks ago. For this, I apologize to my sweetie in Albert Lea and anyone else who may have been negatively affected. But, given current circumstances, I didn't think there was much choice. I still don't. I have to do what's best for the business and if that means I have to be here more than 40 hours a week, so be it. I can't "scale back" yet. Part of that, I'm certain, is because of habit. I have a history of putting in a lot of hours, thinking this may somehow equate to happiness, and seem to have an inbred talent for going to extremes. Or so it has been said. I'm always looking for the happy medium, attempting to walk that fine line, trying to keep everybody happy, trying to avoid conflict at all costs. And where does it get me? It gets me in trouble. Trying to keep everyone happy is a recipe for disaster.

Unfortunately, it's a recipe I have played with far too often at the Star Eagle. I have a feeling my mom probably tried to cook it up a few times herself. That's probably where I get it from.

Speaking of cooking, another area in which I have dropped the ball: meals. I have not, as mentioned last week, prepared three nutritious meals per day in my household. I apologize to anyone who may have been misled by this statement.

Let's see. I'm a failure at scaling back the hours and not very successful at cooking. Check. Check.

The other thing mentioned last week was that ESPN was on our television 24 hours a day at home. It's simply not true. That has been trimmed to less than an hour a day, including Eli's morning and night time. He has many other favorite shows.

So, to be perfectly honest here, there's no way I have shaved 20 hours per week from my previous work schedule, there's no way I have time to cook three nutritious meals per day and, no, ESPN is not on our TV 24 hours a day. I'm too busy working.

The reason these items were included in last week's column is because it was written two weeks earlier.

One thing that was true in last week's column? The cleanliness of our house. I'm proud of the way it's looking at this time and intend to keep it that way.

As mentioned earlier, there is hope for improvement in the scaling back idea. There has to be. Many years ago, as a much younger man, I played doubles tennis with a partner named Lester Hanson from Waseca. As he told me after a double fault one day, "That's O.K." I answered, "It has to be."

There just has to be hope on scaling back my hours. There has to be.